Unexpected happiness

So I've been feeling particularly depressed and mopey lately. I've felt fat an quite unattractive. Today however I got a wild hair up my butt and decided to try on my bikini's from way back before the kids, and a few things happened.

1. I wasn't repulsed by what I saw.

2. My bikini bottoms actually fit.

3. The tops were far too small for the 10lb weights I'm carrying around.

So after my bikini adventures I decided to weigh myself ... 165lbs. I was so happy I yelled out to John and informed him of the good news. Just 5 more pounds and I'm at my pre-baby weight. So no more blaming the kiddos for all of the junk in my trunk. Considering I already had a considerable amount of junk in my trunk I suppose they shouldn't be to blame for my expanding frame (aside from my tummy of course). I feel so excited to see results that I'm gonna buckle down and lose the last five then on to another 30lbs to be at high school weight. We'll see if I've got it in me... for now I'm very hopeful!

Today's photos.... I really need to wear more form fitting shirts because all of mine just hang off the girls.... hmmm


And I need to find a pose that shows it all these curves off....haha


**My husband took the photos so they're not the greatest..how he manages to get blurry photos from an auto focus camera I'll never know!

What do you think?

So I decided to actually post some pictures of me so maybe you all out there in blogger land can see that I actually am making some progress from where I started.
Pregnant with number one... William days before he was born weighing 205lbs


Pregnant with number two... Luca the day before he was born weighing 225lbs

The day after giving birth to Luca 218lbs

Oh the many times I wish I could crop myself out are a plenty....

How many times have I ruined a fun family photo with my rolls....too many

Always conscious of covering my belly...another family moment ruined

Serving cake I shouldn't have eaten at my sons first birthday party in March



If only I had someone to give me direction ..it might make it easier to pose for these photos but my hubby was already at the end of his rope when I asked him to take more than one photo.

2 legs instead of one...hmmpf...but I can actually tell I've lost some weight in my face and neck

Squats are my friend

Sometimes...

(BTW for those of you that read my other blog yes those are my chicks in the blue bin...)

Disappointment ...

... at the gym tonight. My trainer decided she'd have me step on the scale tonight to check my progress. 175 lbs! How is it possible that I gained 5lbs? I follow my diet and I work out. I don't understand. My trainer assured me that I had no need to worry, that it was after 7pm when I weighed and I'd just eaten dinner before going to the gym. So I think I'll weigh in tomorrow morning just to be sure.

www.Livestrong.com...

also known as the daily plate has helped me out a lot. I've found that when I track my food that I'm actually more aware of what I'm putting into my mouth and how much I need to burn to achieve my goal. So I was just imputing my meals today onto the website and I decided to check my weight history... on May 21st last year I weighed 196lbs. I currently weigh 170lbs, however, the last week of July I stopped dieting, and did not pick it back up until April 2 of this year. Weighing in at 180- 185lbs depending on the time of day I got back on the diet train and have been chugging out regular workouts and activities if I miss the gym. So I guess my point is no matter how long you stumble away from your goal you can always get back on track, and be sure to find a way to be accountable to someone or something.

So today...

In an effort to spend more time with me, John decided our Mother's/Father's day gifts should be two bicycles. Maybe I should re-phrase... two GOOD bicycles. In other words, not vintage. We actually have four bikes already but they are all vintage except one, and that one is actually too small for us to ride comfortably. I took John's vintage Schwinn road bike out on the bike trail for a 28 (?) mile ride and found that when I got home the bike was falling apart! Something had been hitting my feet and calves periodically, but I didn't see anything. Turns out the nuts/bolts/ screws were falling off the bike. I'm lucky I made it back to the truck without having to carry the bike back. Our trek to obtain two bikes lead us to Costco on Rosedale Highway where we had found two bikes we liked last week. Today, however, the women's bikes were gone...sold out. So we drove over to Costco on Panama Lane hoping they would still have at least one in stock. No such luck. Both stores did have the bike John wanted but he didn't want to buy his if I couldn't get one too. After the purpose of buying them is so we can go out on the bike trail together with our kids being towed safely behind us in our Schwinn trailer. Since we didn't find the bikes at Costco we stopped by Action Sports on our way home and were quickly disheartened by their prices. The lowest priced bicycle we found was $350, ON SALE! Needless to say we did not buy from there. Oh well, the search continues.

Chips A... oh no!

So my husband did some grocery shopping while I was at the gym and came home with a package of Chips Ahoy. Ugh! How could he do this to me?!? Well I was able to resist for a bit but today a succumbed to the temptation and had one. Yes just one. Once I took that bite sized cookie in my hand I just popped it in my mouth, and I must say... SO NOT WORTH IT!! These new and improved Chips Ahoy are not the delicious, soft a chewy three- four bite cookies they used to be. They are tiny bite sized sweet traps. Not only do they have high fructose corn syrup but they also contain sugar and molasses. Too sweet for me, but that could be because I've eliminated sugar from my diet. So how many calories were in that tiny little cookie? SIXTY!! And twenty five of the calories are from fat. Insane! So what is the serving size you ask, well maybe you didn't but I'll tell you anyway... TWO!! Now how many people can actually eat just two and stop? Not many. So here's my advice to you...

1. Check your nutrition labels

2. Avoid High Fructose Corn Syrup

3. Avoid Hydrogenated Oils/ Partially Hydrogenated Oils

4. Aim for natural foods not processed

5. Reduce your fat intake

And most of all DON'T LET YOUR SIGNIFICANT OTHER DO THE SHOPPING if he/she isn't dieting too!

What to do....

... When there is sooo much wonderful food laid out before you. I attended a Ladies Tea tonight and had to resist eating more than I should. I kept my pieces small, very small, but did attempt to at least taste everything. After all the ladies at my church did slave away in the kitchen making tarts, quiches, mini cakes, lady fingers, biscuits, bite sized cucumber sandwich's, bite sized egg sandwich's, and I made cinnamon sugar biscotti's. It was all laid out so nice, a perfect arrangement if you will. I've been doing so well 15 pounds gone so far so what harm can eating bite sized treats have?

In other news I have not been to the gym since Monday April 26Th, Not that I haven't been active at home because I have. I'm still doing push ups and crunches (assisted by my two boys of course). However Tuesday I was rushing to catch my 13 month old as he was falling and I tweaked my knee just right. The same knee I had surgery on to repair a severed meniscus, torn ACL and PCL, it's been quite unpleasant all week causing twinges of pain when I land on it just so. I planned on resting Tuesday and attending my appointment with my trainer on Wednesday. However Wednesday just an hour before I was suppose to leave my trainer called and cancelled. So I decided to ice my knee, wrap it and rest up. I do plan on returning Monday to regular workouts all though I will ease up if I feel the slightest twinge because I don't want to have to endure being unable to walk without assistance again for 3 months.

I hope that reading my struggles will help you... whoever you are remain strong in your weight loss goals.